


Blunt

by AdelaideArcher



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, HP: EWE
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-08-18
Updated: 2015-08-21
Packaged: 2018-04-15 08:09:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 396
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4599258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AdelaideArcher/pseuds/AdelaideArcher
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Precision, perfection...passion?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Blunt

The eighth year students worked industriously in the muffled quiet of the dungeon. Hermione barely noticed her peers as she attempted in vain to slice her haliwinkle to the specifications of the exacting Professor Snape.

She registered a presence behind her. Before she could react she was trapped by a black-robed, button-cuffed arm on either side of her suddenly trembling body.

“Your knife is blunt.” Warm breath ghosted across her tingling ear. A whispered spell rendered the blade razor sharp; his hand closed over hers.

“In _all_ things, Miss Granger, precision and timing are paramount to a...mutually gratifying...conclusion.”


	2. Fertile

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Professor Snape sees something Hermione would rather he didn't. That can't be good, can it?

Visions of naked, slick bodies danced through his mind. He drew a sharp breath. Underneath the surprisingly adventurous images he detected undercurrents that he hadn’t expected; certainly not from her. It took him a moment to place the emotions: desire, longing, want, affection, trust.

She turned away, mortified. She thought her Occlumency walls were solid, unimpeachable. She was wrong, and now her most private thoughts and dreams had been uncovered by the very man who starred in them.

He gently turned her face towards him.

“Miss Granger,” he purred. “I am delighted to find your imagination is so...fertile.”


	3. The Sure Thing?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ron Weasley, in the Prefects' Bathroom, with a dirty magazine...
> 
> Today's prompt was Moist.
> 
> I own nothing...it's all JK's, with a nod to the John Cusack film The Sure Thing, and another nod to the great Seinfeld.

_Dear Playwitch,_

_I never thought these letters were real, until last night in the prefects’ bathroom._

_I was in the bathtub, having a “good time”, wink wink._

_Suddenly the door opened, and through the moisture and steam I saw a beautiful blonde witch. She dropped her robes and dived into the water. To my delight I saw that she was stark naked! She had generous scoops of flesh --_ I'm sure they'll know that means tits _\-- and her legs went on for miles. She was hot!_

_I stood up seductively. She looked at me and said one word._

_"Shrinkage?"_


	4. Aura

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luna interviews Harry about his job.

"What a wonderful time you must have at work, Harry! All those colours and swirling mists. You can tell a lot about a person by the colours they project -- if someone is yellow, it means they want people to think they're always happy, whereas they often have a forced jollity about them, a bit like they've got blibbering humdingers floating about. And a gold one like yours, Harry, means you’re very brave and noble but can get bogged down in having to do things for others. Do you ever do any work with chakras?”

“Luna, it’s Auror, not aura.”


End file.
